The Recovery

Your Majesty has read with great amusement the claims of Obama The Thin Skinned that his monetary monstrosity, nicknamed the Stimulus Bill, has engineered the economic recovery. The Emperor seems to recall that the timing of the recovery was predicted about the time it began. The realm's economic wizards originally claimed it would occur last summer but later updated their prediction to the current season. If the recovery has indeed occurred, it is very weak. A small hiccup of economic life in the vast economic valley of death. The Obamanite publicity necromancers have trumpeted figures stating their plan has "saved or created" 1 million jobs but even their own ideological allies in the Associated Press scoffed at their preposterous claims. It is possible the Obomanites saved a few teacher jobs and may have created a few temporary positions in the numerous unnecessary and wasteful infrastructure projects but they are all swept away in the enormous tidal wave of crushing unemployment throughout the realm. The small, strained, fetid burp of economic growth that occurred as a result of government assistance with automobile and home purchases has already died and been buried beneath the avalanche of massive public debt that the stimulus spending incurred. It pains the Emperor to point out the obvious but our beloved subjects are far from seeing a real economic recovery such as they may recall from the 80's. In fact, the recovery will likely be weaker and later than expected due to the foolish policies of the ruling Order of the Donkeys. The latest spending trends of the people indicate the truth. Our beloved subjects have little in the way of coin and hoard it against the possibility of a deeper economic crisis and the certainty of higher taxation. The vast sea of government spending at the federal, state, and local level has exceeded the revenue confiscated from the citizens through their taxes. The massive socialistic gravy train of opulent entitlement programs has long been fueled by the taxation blood ticks that suck economic life from the great stream of consumer spending but now that the stream has been slowed to a trickle, the bloated parasitic socialist programs have turned to feeding off the muscle and sinew of society itself. Local communities suddenly find they have no money for education, emergency services, or public administration because all the funds have been swallowed up by the fat sows of socialism. The realms local provinces are forced to raise galling taxes on sales and property in and effort to prevent the total collapse of the community but find the villagers are already close to the breaking point and getting rebellious. His Majesty encourages his beloved subjects to follow their good instincts and conserve their meager earnings in anticipation of day when the Order of the Donkeys no longer hold sway over the realm and life may begin again.

Healthcare

His majesty is greatly disappointed in the activities of Pelosi, Queen of Liberals with regard to health care reform. While the Emperor agrees that the system needs some reform his Majesty believes we are barking up the wrong opinion poll.

His Excellency believes, correctly of course, that health care is a personal responsibility first and foremost. Our individual health is mostly a result of the personal choices we make in life with regard to how we live. A citizen who smokes five packs a day, drinks excessively, uses illegal drugs, overeats, doesn't exercise and has unprotected sex with random partners is going to have more medical problems than someone who lives a more moderate lifestyle. It is not fair to ask a man who lives a healthy lifestyle to pay for the health care of a man who doesn't. As the great American President Ronald Reagan would say, "The government doesn't solve problems, it subsidizes them."

It is also inconsistent with the Constitution to force citizens to buy health insurance against their will. Each citizen is guaranteed the freedom to make his own choices in life. If a young person wants to delay getting health insurance for a few years in order to realize their own personal goals and dreams such as going to college, starting a business, starting a family, or just paying off some higher priority bills then that is their right. It is wrong for the government to force individuals to make personal financial decisions that deny opportunities for the "pursuit of happiness."

It is also wrong to force businesses to fund health care for their employees. Employees should have the option of taking a higher salary instead of medical benefits. It is also unwise the force employers to provide health care for their workers as this will naturally result in companies refusing to higher citizens who look unhealthy or are overweight. Any worker who develops a medical problem while employed will be stuck with that job for life as no other company will be willing to hire a worker with a pre-existing medical condition.

Ironically, the unwise engineers of this medical nightmare are trying to think of incentives to motivate people to live a healthy lifestyle. If people have to pay for their own medical problems resulting from their own personal lifestyle choices, there is no need for an incentive. The incentive is not having medical problems.

The Emperor is so ashamed of the Queen of Liberals and her cohort, Reid the Duke of Donkeys, that he urges all his beloved right-thinking subjects to vote them out of office at the next opportunity so they can be properly banished to the Land of Ravens and Wolves.

Warfare

The Emperor has been hearing much about the "two" wars his beloved nation is involved in. The wars are identified as the war in Iraq and the war in Afghanistan. His Holiness does not see two wars but one that is being fought in two theaters. During the Second World War America fought in two theaters but it was never considered two wars. America is currently in conflict with one enemy and it is not "terrorism". Being at war with "terrorism" makes no more sense than being at war with "carpet bombing." Terrorism is a tactic not an enemy. America is at war with fundamentalist Islam and it is important to recognize that or we will not have a realistic goal in this fight. The Jihadists come from many nations and represent none specifically. They are difficult to fight as they have no infrastructure or standing army. The Emperor believes we are on the wrong track in our fight against these so-called "holy warriors." Trying to create democratic nations of the the barbaric lands of Iraq and Afghanistan may have been a worthy goal but the attempt has failed. The people of these strange lands have elected governments as bad as those we destroyed. These governments are not our friends and they never will be. They share none of our values and beliefs and no American warrior should die to preserve them. It is better to leave and let our enemies fight among themselves. We have historically defeated many foes by exploiting the hostility that exists between those who despise us. It is time to use this tactic again by withdrawing and letting the jihadists fight each other. While they fight we will rest and re-equip our armies. When a victor emerges from the inter tribal fighting of the jihadists, then we will strike them a mighty blow. There should be no attempt to try and civilize these countries. We will destroy their military capability and infrastructure and then leave them to struggle amongst themselves. This "hit and run" tactic may be used repeatedly until they lose the political will or monetary capability to strive against us. It is what they are doing to us.

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Socialism Is Optional

The Emperor hath decreed that henceforth social security and medicare are optional for his beloved subjects. In this way, those citizens who wish to take responsibility for their own retirement may do so. New workers entering the job market must specifically indicate in writing to their employers that they wish to pay the FICA tax. If no indication is made, the tax will not be imposed. Those who are already participating in the Social Security/Medicare program may opt to leave it. If they so choose, all monies paid into the program will be forfeit but no future FICA taxes will taken from their paychecks. Those subjects who are wealthy enough to not need Social Security or Medicare will be encouraged to opt out of the program. As, his Worshipfullness expects that many of his young subjects newly entering the work force will also opt out of the Social Security system, a plan must be implemented to pay off those who still wish to receive their benefits. Social Security and Medicare payments will be paid off over time with the use of regular income taxes. Although, initially the fund shortfall will be great, it is anticipated that the sudden increase by 15.3% of each beloved subject's paycheck will so invigorate the economy that general tax revenues will be sure to soar.

Economic Slavery

Socialistic programs are a form of economic slavery in which there is almost no possibility of release. Slavery, as it existed in the rest of the world in the 17th century, was not necessarily a permanent condition. You could, in most cases, eventually earn your freedom. When slavery was introduced to North America, that concept was changed. A slave had no hope of being released from servitude except by escape or death. Even the offspring of slaves became the property of the slave owner. The slaves had no hope of ever achieving freedom for themselves or their children. Unfortunately, when the American Civil War brought this horrible practice to an end we soon replaced it with a new form of slavery--socialism. We tried it on the American Indians first. Many of the Indian tribes sustained themselves primarily by raiding other tribes and peoples. As this practice was not compatible with our own culture (or anyone else's for that matter) we sought to end it through bribery. If the Indians would just stay on reservations and behave themselves, our government would provide them with food and blankets so they wouldn't have to steal from other people. Of course, the system, being run by the government, was corrupt and inefficient. Food and blankets were illegally sold off by the Indian Agents and the tribes began to starve. When the Indians revolted, the Army was called in to crush them and force them back onto the reservations where they remain today--a demoralized and dependant people living off the crumbs of the federal budget. Since this concept worked so well with the Indians, we soon adopted it for our own citizens through entitlement programs. It began with the elderly with FDR's "New Deal", expanded to minorities by LBJ's "War on Poverty", and is about to be expanded again to all citizens through Obama's "Change We Can Believe In." Once our citizens are enrolled in these programs they are not allowed to leave. They are forever dependent on them. God help us.


Image from The Illustrated London News (Feb. 16, 1861), vol. 38, p.139. (Copy in Special Collections Department, University of Virginia Library) as shown on www.slaveryimages.org